Diaper Discipline: What it is, and why it's dangerous to use
Diaper Discipline - What is it, and what has to be done to get it?
Diaper discipline, also called diaper punishment or "DD", is a type of psychological punishment that involves shaming and humiliating a child/teen (typically used on children between the ages of 2-18. But rarely it is sometimes used on children younger then 2 and older than 18.) by forcing them to wear diapers like a baby. Diaper discipline is administered by the child’s parent(s) to manage the rebellious behavior of children and teenagers. There is a true account of one person's experience with diaper discipline as a child. You can read that by clicking "HERE".
It is similar to diaper domination used on adults, a form of BDSM play rather than legitimate punishment. Many AB (adult baby) or DL (Diaper lover) sites have countless stories regarding being forced to wear a diaper and otherwise be treated as if they were a baby for such things as their parents find out they wet their bed, crying "like a baby" and so. Treating the submissive as baby with the idea of "If your going to act like a baby, I am going to treat you like one". It is sometimes difficult to distinguish AB/DL fiction from the actual real life use of diapers and/or baby items as a punishment. Diapering is an effective punishment for many reasons; the shame and embarrassment of being dressed as a baby, physical discomfort from the diapers' bulk and heat, and the psychological ramifications of being forced to wet and soil oneself.
The discipline can be carried out in a variety of ways and can be either a short-term punishment or an ongoing arrangement to deter future misbehavior. In most cases the child is kept in diapers day and night (24/7) and is required to use the diaper for their intended purpose rather than a toilet (which is often locked during the punishment); leaving the child/teen no choice but to wet or mess the diaper. This in turn leads to questions regarding how and when the child/teen should have their diapers changed.
Some parents use a fixed set of times for changes (for example: the child is changed after breakfast, after lunch time, after dinner and right before bed). Other parents prefer to check the diaper once or twice an hour and just change it when the parent feels it has been used enough. However, many go with the stipulation that if the child asks for a change, that the diaper change should be postponed for an hour each time they ask sending the message that it’s up to the parents to choose when the diaper is to be changed and not the child. That the parents are in charge. Diapering is an obscure and controversial form of discipline which some describe as a form of abuse that hinders a child's development. Others believe it to be a preferable alternative to corporal punishment, with an online community promoting the concept (http://www.diaperdisciplinesite.com).
Diaper discipline is carried out for various reasons and in a variety of ways. Often, it is simply a retaliation to immature behavior with the mind set being that "if you're going to act like a baby, then you'll be treated like a baby", One person on the board is now 19 years old. Her parents put her in DD and regressed her to that of a toddler, all because she didn't get a job after high school. Her parents admit in one post that they did it because they didn't want her to grow up. Many parents on the site deliberately expose their kids to family members and friends, and even change them in front of visitors. It's embarrassing as hell, any adult seen nakid can confirm that. It's not any easier for a child/teen. I have heard parents say they use restraints (similar to those used in mental hospitals) to keep the kid on the changing table and prevent them from fighting. And to restrain them into the crib for the night so they can't get out of the crib. Or spank them until they agree to go along with it. And I have heard of a few parents taking pictures of their child/teen in diapers or in a crib and threaten to expose it at school or online to get the child to go along with the punishment with the least resistance possible.
There was even a posts I came across on another site a long time ago. Parents poured bleach into the child's diaper and applied locking plastic pants to prevent removal of the diaper as part of the diaper discipline. So far I have only come across 2 people who have done this. They say it's to make the diapers uncomfortable or to give the kid diaper rash faster. The parents said they did it to make the punishment more effective, and make the kid think twice before breaking the rules again. I have to admit, if I had bleach in my diaper (I am incontinent so I know where these kids are coming from to a point), I would want to kill myself before I let that happen again. The bleach diapers are abuse of the worst kind I have come across. In other cases the reasoning behind the DD punishment is more complicated.
DiaperDisciplineSite.com is a message board ran by the owner, 42 year old Chip Peruzzi of Murfreesboro Tennessee. The board is a online community of parents (and some children currently being punished with diaper discipline) who encourage each other on the use of diapers and/or baby items (crib, baby bottles, play pen, high chair and so on) as a punishment for their children. "A pro-DD site" I was told. The message board provides several guidelines detailing how and why they believe the punishment should be administered.
Many discussions are about such things as how long the punishment should last, how to keep the children from removing the diapers, how to make the punishment worse if a child is resisting or breaking more house rules, and several of the parents post with weekly updates, or force their children to post updates about what the child did to get the punishment, how their current punishment is progressing and how the child is acting during the punishment (depressed, crying, hitting, resisting, and so on).
One of Chip’s comments regarding diaper discipline (DD) to the parents who are new to DD is: “First when you finally decide to use diapers you can not back down. You must be consistent and unwavering. Diapers go on, no ifs, ands, or buts. Diapers should be worn immediately after school. No pants are to be worn in the house. The child may not cover their diapers up at home. Out in public they need to have pants on but the bathroom is still off limits. Diapers must be used for intended purpose. I recommend once diaper discipline starts, pull ups be worn to school, and their regular underpants be removed from their room or put in the trash. When they come home from school, they trade in those pull ups for regular diapers. Of course on weekends they are to stay diapered. Pretty much once in diapers they have no rights or privileges. What you want to do once diapers are on is up to you. You can be super strict or let them live their life but in diapers. Still recommend spanking bare bottom when needed” (Comment was taken from: http://spankingartwiki.animeotk.com/wiki/Diaper_Discipline)
When it comes to diaper changes, only the parents, another family member or family friend can change the child’s diaper. Rarely a sibling is permitted to change the diaper of a child in diaper discipline. It’s mainly kept as a job for adults. Some families have a strict rule that children in DD cannot ask for a diaper change. They have to quietly wait for a parent to come and check them and it’s up to the parent to decide if the child needs a diaper change or not. If the child does ask for a diaper change, typically he or she is punished for asking for a change by having to sit in the wet/messy diaper for an additional hour. Parents who have this rule claim it’s to send the message that the parents are in charge, not the child. And it makes the child further depend on the parent(s), which seems to be a common desire of the parents on the diaper discipline site.
Sometimes the families just don’t care who sees or knows about the diaper discipline. The parents don’t care who see’s the child in a diaper, and in fact think being seen in the diaper will be a deterrent to breaking the rules or resisting the punishment again in the future.To maximize the shame and embarrassment of the punishment some parents choose to change a wet or dirty diaper in front of company. Some parents invite other family or friends over for the sole purpose of seeing the child in the diapers and causing more shame and embarrassment. If the family goes and visits their aunt and uncle and cousins for example, some parents make the child drop their pants and expose the diaper and tell the family member(s) why they are in diapers. At that point the pants are taken away and the child is told to go play in the diaper and T-shirt as if they were at home. Not all do this, but a few do. And rarely, if one of the child’s friends come over the parents will let them in and then have the child tell the friend why he/she is in diapers before they can go play (while in just a diaper and T-shirt only).
The site, which is not connected to diaper fetishism and will ban AB/DL's from it’s community, claims their goal is to discourage youths from misbehaving by offering them protection from the world in the form of diapers. According to Chip, "Too much rebellion is defensive, and that diapers can provide substitute protection which will curb this behavior" in a manner preferable to corporal punishment. However, they also highlight the controversy of using diapers, and clarify that it will not always work for every family.
The first question parents ask is what the child has to do to deserve being diapered; the site's answer is continued behavioral problems (most common issues are: low grades in school (typically they are diapered for low grades until their grades come up), bed wetting, talking back, throwing tantrums, fighting either at home or at school, getting suspended from school (kids suspended from school typically are in diapers and/or treated like a baby for the length of the suspension), teasing a sibling being punished with diapers (the child teasing the other in diapers finds themselves also in DD), and the list goes on).
One parent on the diaper discipline site wrote: "We make sure that our son only wears a diaper while inside the house. The whole point of the DD is to make sure that he understands and is made somewhat uncomfortable. He wears full clothes while going outside."
Another parent on the diaper discipline site wrote: "**** is not allowed to wear pants in the house while in diapers. Period. It makes it easier for me to see if he's taken them off, though he has yet to try, and serves as a reminder that he's diapered. This also makes it easier to check and change him. Outside he wears disposables and pants, and at school he wears pants over his pull up."
Another quote from Chip, the board’s owner: "Just remember when using DD that he knows why he is being diaper disciplined and will understand that he will be in DD until his behavior changes. It is also important to make sure that it is not pleasant to be changed so that he does not have many accidents."
Many of the parents make the diaper changes uncomfortable for the child by doing it gruff and fast, changed in front of the child’s friends or family or not using powder in the diaper or choosing not to use any other rash protection methods. Most parents add a week to the length of the child’s diaper discipline if the child argues, fights or complains about being changed, or resists having their diapers changed or checked. One parent from the diaper discipline site writes: "He is changed when I decide to do it and he has to let me change him without complaints. He has no control over his diapers and the rules are done to make him feel that."
Because of the diaper changes being made as uncomfortable as possible, the children sometimes try to hold the urine and bowel movements as long as possible as to try to keep from having to be in a messy/wet diaper or to avoid being changed as long as possible. The retention of urine can cause liver damage, kidney damage, UTI’s (Urinary Tract Infection), or bladder damage which can cause loss of bladder control. Holding back BM’s can cause constipation, impaction, a bowel obstruction which requires surgery to correct. Not all parents make the diaper changes uncomfortable, but some do.
Some parents use baby powder with a strong babyish scent such as Johnson's and Johnson's “to make him smell like a baby”. Often times baby diapers are used because of the babyish print on them. If the child is too big, there is/was a topic on the message board with detailed instructions on how to tape two diapers are end to end to make them fit the body of a older child. Baby diapers are used as much as possible if the child is small enough instead of youth or adult diapers, in part because baby diapers have the baby theme designs on the front tape panel where as cloth diapers and youth and adult diapers do not have infantile tape panels. This was because the baby diapers help enforce the feelings of shame and embarrassment for “acting like a baby” as well as make them feel and look as such. The picture below is off of the diaper discipline site’s “links” page.
There are some parents who feel that cloth diapers are the best way to go. Mostly because you are limited with disposables on how thick you can make them, and once your child is too big for even altered baby disposable diapers, cloth diapers are the only choice to use infantile designs with. Cloth diapers also make you feel wetter because they do not have the liner or gel cores that disposables have to make you feel dryer. There are many plastic pants with very infantile designs printed on them. With cloth diapers you can double them up for added bulk between the legs, and thick diapers are easily seen through pants and shorts. Adding doublers adds to the thickness and can extend the times between changes (heard being used for children only being changed 4 times a day).
For children who are new to diapers, this new thickness can make it very difficult during the day. The diaper's bulk constantly is a reminder that they have a diaper on and can make it very difficult to concentrate. Children in diaper discipline who are sent to school in diapers often see a drop in their grades due to loss of concentration due to the diaper. They spend more time focusing on the diaper, fearing who can see, hear or smell the diaper which takes away from thier school work that they should really be focusing on. So diapers at school as a punishment causes un-needed stress as well as set's the child up to be bullied. Kids who wear diapers for a medical need already know this situation. Having to wear a diaper as a punishment make things more difficult.
For children who just started diaper discipline, loss of sleep is a serious issue. The children are not used to the bulk which can be very uncomfortable and make it difficult to fall asleep. Sleep depravation can cause falling alseep during school classes. It can cause accidents such as dropping cups, plates or other objects. It can make it difficult to concentrate on tasks such as driving or working with machines. Lack of sleep can also cause children to become easily irritated and cause them to throw temper tantrums or other bad behavior sometimes without realizing it all due to lack of sleep. The diapers worn at night for diaper discipline, for children new to it, it can cause lack of sleep from not being used to the bulk of the diaper causing tossing and turning trying to get comfortable. This can take days, weeks or even months to get used to the bulk of the diaper. Sleep depravation is a serious thing to be avoided at all cost.
Parents who use cloth diapers use babyish diaper pins and infantile patterns on the plastic pants to make the diapering experience as embarrassing, shameful and uncomfortable as possible. Those who use cloth diapers for diaper discipline use them because there is more involved during a diaper change such as pinning of the diapers and pulling up of the plastic pants and of course the look and feel that is unique only to cloth diapers. Some parents who use cloth diapers for diaper discipline also include having the child wash their wet/messy diapers they used as part of the punishment. Those children who are unlucky enough to have a clothes line in the back yard often find themselves in the back yard hanging their diapers on the line to dry to add additional shame and embarrassment to the punishment. How public the exposure is, or being put in a position (having to grab the mail, or take the trash out to the bin in the driveway) of possibly being seen seems to depend on the nature of the offence or how much resisting they are giving to the punishment.
Why don’t children just resist the discipline or just not go along with it at all? Ones who resist having the diaper put on or refuse to take a bottle the parents give them, or who refuse to get into the crib are either spanked till they submit, are held down and diapered, tied to a bed and diapered or restrained into the crib. Or in extreme cases, drugged with sleeping medication or other sedative medication and then diapered once they fall asleep or a combination of the above.
Some parents have even taken pictures of their children in their diapered state and threaten to show it off to friends or post it online to force the child to go along with the punishment with the least resistance and to prevent future acts of resisting. Or some parents will take the child outside in just a diaper and T-shirt in the yard or other place where there is a chance to be seen as a punishment for resisting, although being taken out in public in a diaper and T-shirt anywhere is extremely rare. Parents often prefer to just have the child wear a short T-shirt that rides up a bit to expose the diaper if they bend over or reach for something. Or diaper them thickly so it’s noticeable through the pants so as to not bring any unwanted attention. Just enough to make people look at the child, but not enough for someone to step in and say something. How bad the punishment and the amount of exposure seems to depend largely on the severity of the offence.
Why not just take the diaper off once the parents leave the room? Kids who try, or have taken the diaper off just make the situation worse. Parents will add duck tape over the tabs to prevent the removal of the diaper or add it anyway to be able to tell if the child has tried to remove the diaper. There are also plastic pants some parents order online that has a small chain or cable sewn into the waist band and a pad lock to prevent tampering or the removal of the diapers completely. There are locking diaper pins too, however they are difficult to find or locate a site that sells them. The plastic pants however are much easier to find, mostly on BDSM sites, sometimes on some AB/DL (Adult Baby/Diaper Lover) sites and a few on select cloth diaper sites.
Some kids who resist or rebel find themselves tied to their bed or some parents order leather wrist and leg restraints similar to those used in mental hospitals and restrain the child to the bed or crib if a crib is used. Others skip the restraints and just spank them multiple times until they are bawling and submit to the parents request for a diaper change, or to get into the crib. For those who choose the restraints, the children/teens are tied/restrained to the changing table. Typically if the child/teen is tied/restrained, it's done until the child agrees to submit to the punishment or until the parent(s) believe that the child has learned not to attempt to remove the diaper or resist any other part of the punishment. Not all the parents restrain their child, but it is done. Below is a picture of the locking plastic pants found on a cloth diaper site that chip has recommended to parents (http://www.plastic-pants.com/big/lockpants.htm). There is a link as well to the site who sells these locking plastic pants on the diaper discipline board under "links"
Chip, the owner of the diaper discipline site feels that the discipline should be administered before the child becomes out of control, before they have even done anything. Parents are encouraged to start this punishment over summer vacation as this way the children can "get used to how the DD works faster" without getting time with the diapers removed. And for the ones getting the full baby treatment, they have no hope of going to school and getting a break from the constant baby treatment. Parents seem to like this because they can keep a constant eye on the diapered child and prevent them from “cheating”. Many parents also sit in the bathroom during baths or showers to prevent the child from using the toilet during shower time or otherwise "cheat". In some cases the parents insist on giving the child/teen their bath for them, Washing them as if they were a baby and unable to do it themselves.
The site claims that the initial reactions such as "Crying, Anger or Depression" are to be expected as the child adjusts to being back in diapers. Saying that they should come to accept being in diapers and/or being treated like a baby in time as they realize it is for their own good. What they don't say is there are countless side effects that children have with DD. They can range from Depression, Anger, Resentment, Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD), Dissociative Disorder, Self Injury (AKA: SI, Self Harm, self-mutilation), Suicide and other mental conditions that stem from the abuse. A few of the children this is done to became TB (Teen Baby) or DL (Diaper Lover) as a way to cope with what happened or is still happening to them. A way of turning something negative, into something positive to be able to deal with it. The mind has many tricks for surviving trama.
I recall some time ago, I came across a story in the news paper about a child being punished with diaper discipline. He was about 8 year old and had been wetting his bed. The parents, upset that he couldn't stay dry decided to start punishing him for it. He was diapered and put in the play pen on the front portch in just a diaper and T-shirt and a stuffed animal and a baby bottle was put in the play pen with him. At some point, friends of the child's passed by and saw him in the play pen and diapers. He was teased a bit, but when he got to school the next day, all the children knew about him being diapered in a play pen and teased him. Later that day on the way home, he jumped off a freeway overpass and died. It was just too much for him to take. I want to prevent anymore children from choosing death to make abuse like this stop.
Diaper discipline can be a short-term or long-term arrangement. Some children are diapered for only a Weekend, others for a few weeks at a time, and other parents choose to keep their child/children in diapers on a more permanent basis (typically till the child is 18 and/or moves out). When children are finished with thier particular session of diaper discipline, the site’s owner suggests that parents keep a stack of diapers on the child’s dresser to be a constant reminder of what will happen if they break the rules again. Diaper Discipline Site describes it as ongoing, with most adolescents being re-potty trained and transitioned out of diapers after they finish high school.
The site recommends that diapers are worn at all times and used for thier intended purpose (no use of the toilet at all), but suggest the use of pull-ups during school hours to allow the child some discretion amongst peers and to keep a low profile at school. Most families won’t take the risk of anyone finding out about the “Family Secret”. Or being caught and turned into the police or children's and family services. So the parents institute a hush hush about the punishment. They make a rule that the child/children must never tell anyone outside the home (Friends, teacher, school therapist and so on) about the diaper punishment (AKA “The family secret”) or face a very harsh punishment.
One example, one parent on the diaper discipline board wrote: “"We try to keep ddiscipline within the family and fairly private except with family and close friends, we recently instated a rule that if anyone told anyone outside of the family who does not know about any of the girls ddscipline, this will automatically earn them 3 months in diapers, 24/7. They all have also been informed of the consequences for telling outsiders about another person's ddiscipline., So far only one of our girls has violated this rule once, by blabbin to her friends about her sister, and earned 3 months in diapers, she has not done it since and we hope she will not do it again, she has been told that a 3rd offense will earn her double total time (6 months, 24/7) in diapers the next time."
As you can see, the “family secret” is heavily guarded. Once the friend who found out leaves, the child gets it worse and for longer. Imagine having to wear diapers, then because you told someone, now you have to lose your twin bed and now have to sleep in a crib. Have your cup replaced with a baby bottle. Be forced to wear a sleeper or onsie because you told someone about your punishment, or your brother/sister’s punishment. The kids are afraid, ashamed and embarrassed to tell anyone about being made to wear diapers, having to use a baby bottle, sleeping in a crib….or worse, making the punishment worse by telling anyone. And what an awful thing to see, a child afraid of their parents. It’s not right. Children are supposed to feel safe and loved at home. Not dread coming home everyday knowing what they will have to deal with.
Most children just deal with it until they can move out and away from it. For several, that’s the only way it will stop as several parents have decided to make their children wear diapers and get the baby treatment until the children leave the homeas an attempt to prevent any further bad or unwanted behavior until the child leaves the home. And the emotions kids feel during this “punishment” or “lifestyle”. Depression, hopelessness, feeling like they are not loved, the damage to their self image, thoughts of suicide for the severe ones, anger over being teased at school for those going to school in diapers, and the list goes on.
There was a time several years ago when I was about 16. I had been bed wetting for a few years already and been wearing diapers secretly to manage it as I was afraid I would be punished for my bed wetting like my brother. Diapers were my choice, they were not forced on me or punished with them and I still had a hard time wearing one. My aunt however did use them as a punishment. She made my brother go to the store and pick out plastic pants and then stand in line and pay for them. Then after dinner he had to go and put them on, and show my aunt before he went to bed to make sure he had them on. Obviously since there was nothing inside to absorb the urine it leaked. It went on for the 2 weeks we were visiting. Then on a visit to our grandparents, he had wet the bed and my grandma went to a neighbor’s house and got a diaper. She told him that if he wet the bed again should would diaper him, and then left it on the coffee table for him to look at all day. That night she made him sleep in the bath tub. So after seeing that I was terrified to tell my parents about my wetting for fear of similar treatment.
Anyway, I had a friend over and he discovered my diapers. I told him why I wore them and he swore he would not tell anyone. The next day I got to school to find he had told several people that I not only wet the bed, but wore diapers as well. I got called several names and comments such as “baby”, “are you wearing a diaper right now?”, “bed wetting baby” and of course the “ha ha, you wear diapers” taunt. And I only wore at night. Imagine what these kids have to deal with having to go to school diapered. Not because they have a wetting problem, but because they got low grades on a report card, or because they got home too late, or talked back. School is hard enough without adding the stress of a high profile thing as wearing diapers to be teased about everyday. I say high profile because in many kids minds, diapers are for babies, and only babies wear them. And most kids, especially the younger kids have a horrible habit of saying exactly what they are thinking and those things are normally very hurtful. School is stressful enough without the shame and embarrassment of being diaper disciplined at home, and then sent to school diapered.
Punished, and sent to school in diapers too? Wouldn’t someone notice? One would think. But the parents on the diaper discipline site post the excuse they used so their child can be diapered at school and a few are even being changed by the nurse. They don’t even get to use the bathroom at school. It’s true that there are children who truly do need diapers due to a medical condition or mental retardation for example, and there is nothing wrong with wearing protection because you need it. It's quite another to be forced to wear a diaper when you have no bladder or bowel control problem. I am not a parent, nor did I need to wear diapers at school myself. But I would think that to have a student in diapers, or to even have the nurse change a student's diaper there should have to be a letter from the doctor explaining the illness that requires the child to need to wear diapers at school and/or have that diaper be changed by a nurse.
One of the parents on the board used the excuse saying her son needed to wear diapers for an "emotional problem". And had the extra diapers in the nurses office for when he needed a change at school. Another parent uses that her child has frequent bladder infections. And another parent uses the excuse that her child is having frequent wetting accidents and that's why he is being sent to school in diapers.
Ask for notes from doctors saying what’s going on and that diapers are required and for how long. Look for those red flags. Kids can’t stand up for themselves or protect themselves. That’s what adults are for and supposed to do. And I know of no "emotional problems" that cause the loss of bladder/bowel control. Kids with ADD/ADHD have been known to have wetting accidents that’s true. But aside from that, what possible emotional problem could possibly cause the loss of bladder and/or bowel control in a child that was coming to school say, last week with no bladder problems? And wouldn’t it seem strange to anyone that one week the kid is fine, the next week he’s coming to school in diapers, and then next week no diapers, then diapers again. Doesn’t that raise any red flags at all? Come on people, ask questions, Get involved. These kids need someone to speak up for them.
When the question was aked if diaper discipline might be against the law, the owner of the board said to the parents that are punishing their children with diapers that it is not abuse, and not against the law. First off, if that was true, why worry about anyone else finding out? And also, if this punishment was ok and such a success why doesn’t every parent use it? Or way doesn't child services teach it in their parenting classes if it produces such great results? Clearly there is something wrong with doing this to a child….or anyone for that matter.
I contacted a branch of children's and family services (DCS, CPS, DCFS...whatever it is where you live). I described in much details to them about how a typical diaper discipline “session” is done. About the rules of locking the bathroom door and making the child wear diapers and making them use the diapers. About making them sleep in a baby crib, eat in a high chair, drink all liquids from a bottle and so on. Sending them to school in diapers when they have no bladder/bowel control problem. I asked if it was against the law or not. What I was told is that although there isn’t a specific law that covers diaper discipline, there are two laws it would fall under should someone be found doing it and charged with it. Those two laws are:
PC 11165.3: As used in this article, “The willful harming or injuring of a child or the endangering of the person or health of a child” means a situation in which any person willfully causes or permits any child to suffer, or inflicts thereon, unjustifiable physical pain or mental suffering, or having the care or custody of any child, willfully causes or permits the person or health of the child to be placed in a situation in which his or her person or health is endangered.
PC 11165.4: As used in this article, “Unlawful corporal punishment or injury” means a situation where any person willfully inflicts upon any child any cruel or inhuman corporal punishment or injury resulting in a traumatic condition.
Should a parent be found doing DD and child services get’s a report about possible child abuse the child or children could be removed from the parent’s custody in addition to criminal charges being pressed bases on the level of abuse.
Some kids don't have to wear to school, however, they must give up their pants/shorts when they return home from school and must be returned to diapers immediately after school and remain diapered all day on weekends and holidays. Parents are told if the punishment is ongoing, all of the child's normal underwear should be taken from them and thrown away or even cut up and disposed of to "help them accept their diapers". The site explains that, while pants and shorts need to be worn in public, diapers should be kept in plain sight at home (typically the child is only in the diaper and a T-shirt when at home); the child may not cover them with other clothes. They cannot cover the diaper with blankets or anything else. When in bed unless it’s cold they are put to bed in only the diaper and/or T-shirt, no blankets. This is done to maximize the shame and embarrassment of being in a diaper by not being able to hide the diapers from sight. Having them exposed, keeps them in mind constantly, you can't forget your in diapers.
When the pants/shorts are not in use, they are locked up. Minor public exposure can be inflicted through household chores such as retrieving the mail or hanging out the laundry. Some parents choose to elaborate on diaper discipline by administering full baby treatment with pacifiers, cribs, playpens, onsies and sleepers in their size (some parents who use baby clothes in their child's size order sleepers with the zipper in the back to prevent the child from removing the article of clothing), baby bottles for all liquids, and rarely they make the child drink baby formula and eat baby food, although this is not always the case. Some parents make the punishment worse by dressing their children in shorts and a short T-shirt so when they bend over to pick something up or are forced to hold their parents hand, the shirt rides up and exposes the diaper. Some parents pick out all their childrens school clothing each day that they will wear out as if they are a baby and are incapable of picking out clothing or dressing themselves.
One member, a parent of 3 children made a post about how he performs the punishment along with the rules of his household. His oldest is 15 years old and he says he will be in “DD” until he graduates from high school.
“Normal DD Rules
1)Cloth diapers only at home; never disposable (No pants at home)
2)Disposable diapers out of the house
3)UnderJams under a pair of colored briefs to school; the potty may be used at school. School is the only place Matt may use the potty
4)Diaper checks occur every hour on the hour, no exceptions. Diapers are checked by me looking down the back for poop and putting a finger down the front for pee. If we are out, Matt must put his pants around his ankles for diaper checks. He can ask for neither a check nor a change.
5)Changes occur at my discretion only. At home they occur on the changing table in his room or in the living room. Out of the house they occur in the men's room on the floor or in the car
6)Bedtime is 9:00 p.m. On weekends it may be extended to 10:30pm provided good behavior and a nap of at least 45 minutes.
10)He must start getting ready for bed an hour before, in other words 8:00 p.m.His last diaper check/change occurs then; afterwards he must wait until morning (even on weekends). He must bathe before bed. He may sleep only in a diaper. He must have his teddy bear, pacifier, and bottle with him in bed. He must have his daily "us" time before bed. During this time he must drink the whole bottle I give him.
11)During swimming time (we go every Saturday) He is to wear a swim diaper
12)All homework must be completed before bed
13)Standard decency and etiquette rules must be followed. Failure to abide will result in a spanking and a loss of privileges and stricter rules
Stricter DD Rules
1)I choose what clothing he wears
2)I feed him his breakfast and dinner (lunch on weekends)
3)Outside of school he may only drink from a bottle
4)I give him a bath (instead of allowing him to take it with his little brothers and then inspecting them)
5)Bedtime is 7:00pm
6)He must have a pacifier in his mouth at all times at home in which he is not eating
7)Homework is to be done at the kitchen table starting as soon as he gets out of school”
Another parent of a 16 year old posted saying: “When I found my daughter having intercourse at 16. I put her in diapers. She is now 19 and will stay that way until she leaves home. I also have her suck on a pacifier, drink from a bottle, and sleep in a crib. She has not looked at a boy with her dirty mind since.”
One child commented about his punishment: "Whenever I am being punished for mouthing off, I am forced to wear a pacifier. It makes the punishment that much worse because not only do I have to dress like a toddler (with diapers) but I also have to constantly keep a pacifier in my mouth."
Diaper Discipline being used on children has been around for many, many years. It was often used on children who wet the bed by parents who felt their child was acting like a baby by wetting the bed, or felt their child was just being lazy and not going to the bathroom. Or was doing it for attention or to get back at them for something the parents did. Back then, and even now in some places, the thought of parents is that children wet the bed because they are lazy or to get back at a parent or even to get attention. Parents who had their child checked out at the doctor and the doctor cannot find a cause, some parents take that as proof that their child is doing it on purpose or for attention.
The parents who diaper the child as punishment for bed wetting would put the child in a diaper normally after dinner or after their evening bath. They would have their child stay in the diaper until after breakfast the next morning. Or the child would have to wear diapers during the day and at night (24/7) until the child could produce a dry bed/diaper 7 nights in a row. The parents response when the child asks why diapers is that since they are wetting the bed like a baby, they will be treated like a baby.
For the children in diapers day and night, the child would have to let the parent know they had to go. The child’s diaper would be removed so they could use the bathroom and then it would be put back on with exception to overnight where they would be expected the hold it till morning. Diaper Discipline is not like having a bed wetting child wear a diaper to keep the bedding dry and to give the child a better night’s sleep. Clearly the above is to give the message that the child is acting like a baby and should be treated as a baby by wearing a diaper.
Because bed wetting can last several years, and sometimes into adulthood the child has no way to stop it other than staying up all night or moving out and away from the abuser. And it has been proven that stress can make it worse. Such as the stress that comes from the threat of being spanked in the morning if they wet. Or yelling at the child. The stress can increase the length of time the child would have stopped wetting, and make it go on for months to years longer than it has to. Using DD for bed wetting is just setting the child up to fail. The child knows they will wet the bed if they fall asleep, and it causes unneeded stress knowing in the morning they will either be spanked for the wetting, diapered or both.
Diaper Discipline first became popular in the S&M/BDSM community as a way to dominate or humiliate the person (or Sub) they are punishing. People in this group also enjoy being whipped, spanked, and diapered with the intent to embarrass or shame the person. Typically people engage in this activity as a way to give up responsibility for those in a commanding profession, or to be punished for things they have done since the last “session” or just for fun.
However over the years, using diapers to punish someone started to be used on those who didn’t want it and couldn’t stop it….Children. As mentioned above, the commonly heard use of Diaper Discipline or DD is used on children to get the desired behavior. And it’s used for as little as a weekend or used sometimes until the child moves out of the home. DD typically uses shame, embarrassment and fear to get the child to change their behavior to what the parent(s) desire.
Diaper Discipline – The effectiveness of Diaper Discipline:
Because the use of diaper discipline has never been observed (as far as I know of) by a therapist or psychiatrist, it’s unclear how safe it is mentally. Some say it’s simply marginally abusive considered to things like spankings or beatings. However it does threaten the child's dignity and sense of maturity as well as his/her self esteem and self image. Care must be taken when evaluating stories of DD use, and to separate parents and children who might be involved with the practice in reality, from AB/DLs who advocate the practice purely because they think they would have liked to have had this experience when they were a child. The big difference is, AB/TB/DL's enjoy it, but children not in the lifestyle, it's pure tourture. There is no other word for it.
Upon being forced back into diapers, a person's most immediate concern will usually be the unfamiliar physical feelings caused by the diaper between their legs and the look of themselves in the diaper. Children seem to believe that diapers are ONLY for babies, and no one older than about 2 or 3 should be wearing one. And if you do, those who wear one are typically called a "baby" by other children. Heck, even when I was using diapers for my bed wetting, I found it very hard to get the thought that “only babies wear diapers” out of my mind. And I wasn’t being forced into using diapers. So it makes you wonder what a kid with no wetting or messing problems is thinking of himself/herself being put in a diaper.
For a child just being put back in diapers, they will find it an uncomfortable feeling for a child unused to wearing them, and this discomfort is a important part of DD. It seems it's important to feel uncomfortable as it serves as a constant reminder of the child's diapered status. Diapers are thicker than normal underwear (and can be as thick as a inch thick with the overnight disposables), and the bulk between their legs typically alters a child’s walk and cause them to waddle slightly.
Trapped body heat also causes diapers to feel much warmer than underwear and perspiration can cause a diaper to feel wet even if it has not been urinated in. On a superficial level, the appearance of a diaper will also cause the wearer to be concerned about their personal image, whether it's simply the outline of the diaper on their figure or the diaper being fully visible. Passing a mirror in the hallway and seeing themselves in a diaper can be upsetting. Doubling diapers up is an easy and effective way of increasing bulk, heat, and visibility to enhance the discipline. And also extend the time between changes.
In terms of using the diapers, toilet training is one of the most significant events in a human being's life; children are taught at an early age that wetting and soiling themselves is not acceptable, and this plays a crucial part in their psychological development. Therefore, returning a child to diapers and forcing them to basically reverse their toilet training causes much emotional turmoil. It also deprives them of the most basic level of privacy and independence; they no longer have any control over where and when to relieve themselves.
Males react differently to diaper discipline than females do. As an external part of his anatomy, a man relies on being able to access his genitals to confirm their presence and state, and putting him in diapers deprives him of this. Females on the other hand, are accustomed to their genitals being internal, and so diapers will not affect them in the same way. Women also experience a form of incontinence in the menstrual cycle; having no control over a bodily function and relying on diaper-like products for personal hygiene and discretion. A man, on the other hand, lacks this experience, and so being in diapers will be more foreign to him.
Diaper Discipline – Diaper use and diaper changes:
Whether or not a child being disciplined has to use their diapers, is the decision of their parent or guardian. Some children may be allowed to have their diapers temporarily removed for access to the bathroom for both urine and a BM, some only get the diaper removed for a BM and have to use the diaper for urine, while others may be denied access to a toilet completely and forced to urinate and defecate inside their diapers instead.
Diaper Discipline Site emphasizes the importance of children and teenagers using their diapers for their intended purpose. While acknowledging that diapers should be kept hidden under normal clothes in public, they maintain that the bathroom should be off-limits at all times and children should use pull-ups at school. Responding to questions about any long-term medical problems, the site explains that some people may lose bladder and bowel control as they get used to diapers, but claim this can be quickly re-trained within a week after the discipline is over.
It is common for teenagers to refuse to use their diapers out of defiance; while they will not be able to avoid wetting their diaper for long, messy diapers are much easier to hold off due to bowel movements being naturally less urgent. The article "Diapering Techniques: Dealing with a Stubborn Teen", which refers to diaper use in disciplinary, medical, and recreational situations, sympathizes with teenagers in diapers, pointing out that being forced to wet or soil yourself and then sit in it until you are changed is an unpleasant experience for most people. Nevertheless, it stresses that they do not have a choice in the matter, and offers several suggestions for encouraging a dirty diaper. Communication between parent and child is emphasized, with medication such as enama's, suppositories and laxatives recommended as more drastic solutions for forcing the child to mess their diaper. It further advised that children are allowed to spend time in their messy diaper to explore the feelings and record their thoughts in a journal.
Soiled diapers are a particularly effective aspect of the discipline because of their unfamiliarity; a wet diaper feels similar to a wet bathing suit but the sensations of being in a full diaper (messy diaper) will be quite alien to the wearer as they will probably not have experienced such a feeling since infancy. Spending time in their soiled diapers will be a traumatic process for the person being disciplined and they will likely be unable to concentrate on anything other than the content of their diaper, making them feel like more of a baby, the whole point of the punishment. “You’re acting like a baby, so you will be treated like one”.
The site explains that diapers should be changed regularly and both parents are encouraged to take part in this "social and intimate exchange"; fathers who were reluctant to change diapers when their children were babies are advised that participation is "very important". However, for some families, they believe that having preset times for being changed (after breakfast, after lunch, after dinner and before bed), makes the punishment more effective. Parents should check diapers regularly, even out in public, since children may not always approach them for a change.
Older children will not necessarily need changing after wetting their diapers, but it is important to change them soon after they have a bowel movement for health reasons. The existence of pubic hair can make clean up difficult, so some parents choose to shave it off for hygiene; shaving also serves to enhance discomfort as the wearer will be unable to scratch the subsequent itch through their diaper. Rarely is the person being disciplined allowed to change their own diapers and in some cases measures are actively taken to prevent this through the use of restrictive clothing such as locking plastic pants (picture of plastic pants shown earlier in article), blanket sleepers made with the zipper in the back to prevent removal, onsies like a baby or toddler would wear and other types of restrictive infantile items.
Diaper Discipline – What others say about this form of “Discipline”:
Diaper discipline as a parental practice can be controversial. At the website Child Abuse Effects, one user described a situation in which a seventeen-year-old boy had been kept in diapers since age twelve, asking whether this was legal and would be considered abuse. Violence and abuse prevention educator Darlene Barriere responded by saying that forcibly diapering an adolescent as punishment was not illegal, as far as she knew. However, she claimed that treating a teenager like a small child would fall under a form of abuse known as "rejecting", describing it as a "humiliating, and cruel and unusual punishment". She speculated that it may also be considered neglect, physical or sexual abuse depending on where, when and how the boy in question is being made to use diapers.
Upon being contacted by another reader, who detailed his own experiences with diaper discipline, Barriere once again addressed the issue. She explained that people who administer diaper discipline are experimenting with a controversial psychology known as “regression therapy” that can be emotionally devastating even when administered professionally, and that parents would not consider the practice were they aware of it’s consequences. The reader in question, Robert P., offered his own opinions regarding the appearance of diaper discipline versus it's actual effects. He claimed that children being disciplined may appear calm and well-behaved, when in reality this obedience is a result of their self-esteem having been destroyed and their social development severely hindered. Robert concluded that diaper discipline is "the killing of a human soul". In contrast, Diaper Discipline Site described keeping children in diapers as "relatively safe" when compared to other common methods of discipline such as spanking, screaming, and medication such as Ritalin.
On my website BedwettingABDL.com there are several forum discussions regarding diaper discipline, with me, Stanley Thornton, a vocal critic of the practice and sites that support it like DiaperDiscipline.net. I explain diaper discipline as making children wear diapers without pants, they can't change themselves, bathroom is off limits just to name a few stipulations. And this can go on sometimes for months all over things like wetting the bed, talking back, bad school grades, fighting with siblings and other similar things.
I firmly believe that the punishment is too extreme for the offences it is used for, and that using humiliation as discipline will cause psychological damage. I question the logic behind the punishment, citing a former Yahoo 360 page (Recently Removed) owner, 42 year old Chip Peruzzi, whose motto was "Diaper Discipline. All teens should have diaper rash. Thick diapers for you." The page claimed to help parents whose children were out of control, but I asked, "How is getting a B in math out of control? And how is being put in diapers for a month supposed to help? And how is keeping them in a wet/messy diaper until they get diaper rash discipline" That's torture.
In a short conversation with Chip over instant messenger, we talked about it's use. He said on more than one time that if he had children, he feels he would use diaper discipline on them if they misbehaved. When asked about diaper rash, he says he feels letting a mild diaper rash develop is all part of being in diapers and sees no problem with it.
It should be noted that putting a child or teenager back in diapers—even against their will—because they wet the bed is not generally considered diaper discipline, but rather a practical solution to a medical condition. At the very least, a plastic sheet on the mattress. Only if the child is actually being punished for the supposed offence of wetting their bed would their diapers be seen as a form of discipline. Issues regarding the child's independence, privacy, dignity and self esteem usually play a far more vital role in bed wetting cases than they do during diaper discipline, and the diapers themselves are often disguised as regular underwear (Goodnites or Underjams for example) in order to reduce the child's embarrassment. Whereas diaper discipline is a fairly obscure practice, using diapers to manage bedwetting is relatively common, with mainstream products such as GoodNites and UnderJams marketed specifically for that purpose.
Diaper Discipline – In Popular Culture:
Diaper discipline is often featured in many AB/DL fiction as a plot device to get older children, teenagers, and adults into diapers. "Poor Little Rich Boy", one of the Diaper Daze series of AB/DL comic books, tells the story of Erik, a seventeen-year-old boy who is put on a "baby discipline programme" by his step-mother after the death of his father. Erik's step-mother decides to blackmail the rebellious teenager by denying him his inheritance unless he agrees to live as her helpless baby. The comic depicts Erik being subjected to various humiliations as he is paraded in front of his amused aunt, who begins to consider baby discipline for her own son.
Diaper discipline is portrayed as a form of child abuse in the independent film "Redemption" by Michael Bryson. When a girl accidentally causes her father's death in a car accident, her mother—who already resented her daughter for the close relationship she shared with her father—begins punishing her for wetting the bed by making the twelve-year-old wear diapers. The girl is beaten until she submits to being diapered. The girl has to wear diapers, suck a baby's pacifier, and drink from a baby bottle in plain sight indoors. The girl is taken out (just showes the girl in a dress and her mom leave out the front door) with her mom after her mom checks to see she still has the diaper on under her dress and her mom is carrying a diaper bag on her shoulder as they walk out the front door. Later in the movie her diaper is changed and the girl is dragged out the back door into the back yard with the girls mother saying “time to go outside, that’s where little girls go who don’t behave”. The girl grabs onto the door frame to try to prevent being pulled outside for all to see while crying and begging not to be taken outside. Eventually she can't take anymore humiliation and kills her mother with a gun. Years later, the girl is now married and feels compelled to relive her mother's punishments by wearing diapers and drinking from a baby bottle. Of course I do not endorse killing someone to get out of this punishment. The child or witness should instead call the police (911) or child services abuse tip line at (1-800-4-A-CHILD/1-800-422-4453), or tell a teach or school therapist for help.
Your able to download the movie "Redemption" if you like. You need to also download and install a video program called DIVX. You can download it by going to “http://www.divx.com/en/win". Then after you download the movie you will be able to play it. You can download the video to watch by going to the address below. Click on the text button “Download Original (201,380,020 bytes) to get a copy of the movie:
http://www.sendspace.com/file/w7vmf5 There are two options, a free download that takes just over 40 minutes or a paid download that can download Redemption in just over 6 minutes. Up to you.
In the 2005 series of UK reality series Big Brother, contestant Maxwell was humorously diaper disciplined by Big Brother. As punishment for setting fire to a pair of underpants, the twenty four year old was forced to dress up as a baby and sit on the "naughty step".
Diaper Discipline – Closing:
What I found interesting and shocking was that the owner of the site, Chip Peruzzi, does not have children. He has never used DD on any children, and DD was never used on him. But yet this man gives out instructions on how parents should punish their children with DD. He has no idea what psychological damage is being done by doing this. In fact many of the children who are in DD long term, lose much if not all of their bladder and/or bowel control.
What is also interesting is several people I have talked to who were punished with DD said they left home and moved away, some to another state and never had contact with their parents again. Many are also in therapy in hopes to undo the damage that was done. Some felt that they deserved the punishment. Feeling that bad grades and talking back got them the punishment they deserved, that they should have been good.
It’s true a child should be punished for disrespecting their parents or breaking rules, but not like that. There are plenty of good ways to discipline a child without tearing them down with shame, fear and embarrassment. Time outs, grounding them, taking away toys, taking away cell phones or computer, having to do extra chores around the house, having to go to bed early. Punishments that do not shame, embarrass or otherwise tear down a child. But instead the parents turned to DD to make their children behave better. What went on that caused these children to feel that what they did was so bad, so horrible, to deserve such a cruel punishment like DD? To think it was fair and what they had coming to them.
And as much as Chip and other parents tell me it doesn’t happen, DD can (and in several children) has cause the child to develop a fetish for the diapers and/or baby items that are being used on them. They become what is known as a TB or DL. Not because they wore a diaper, or drank from a bottle, but because of the situation it was done in. It’s a way to cope with the trauma of what happened, or is still happening to them. Not everyone punished with DD will end up being TB or DL, but I noticed a pretty fair amount did. Of course I don’t know every victim, and didn’t talk to everyone who ever was punished with diapers and or baby items. But those I have talked to over the years who were punished using diaper discipline, have seemed to turn to being TB or DL as a means to deal with it.
If you are being punished with diaper discipline, or know of anyone who is being abused using diaper discipline, you should call your local child protective services and make a report. If you are a child and being abuse, please call the police (911) or tell your teacher at school or a therapist if you see one, what is going on. They have to report the abuse by law, or they can go to jail. You can also make a child abuse report by calling a child abuse tipline at (1800)4-A-CHILD/(1800)422-4453.
You can also e-mail them at "firstname.lastname@example.org". They should be able to send it to the right office that handles your area. Be as specific as possible. Weather you e-mail, or call to report it, make sure you include your first and last time as well as your address where you (or the child being abused) live. Include as much detail as you can about what is happening so they can get you/the child the help they need to make it stop. No one deserves to get a punishment like this. No one!
For those who really wish to make a impact on this besides turning cases of diaper discipline to the police or child services, there is a petition to create a law that is just to stop diaper discipline. There are laws currently against the use of diaper discipline however sadly there are loopholes. With creating a law that is just for diaper discipline would help close some of those loop holes and get these kids some help. Please take a few moments and sign the Stop Diaper Discipline Petition. It's free and only takes a few moments: http://www.thepetitionsite.com/1/Help-Ban-Diaper-Discipline/
2) Bedwettingabdl: http://www.bedwettingabdl.com is a site that gives support to those with a bed wetting/day wetting problem, those who are AB/DL or both. This site has a few topics on the message board about the topic of diaper discipline.
3) Diaper Discipline: http://www.diaperdisciplinesite.com is it site for parents who actively use diaper discipline on one or all of their children. It has links to places to purchase items to carry out the punishment (such as diapers, cribs, locking plastic pants to prevent diaper removal and other such links).
Article Written By: Stanley Thornton (Stanley_19802@yahoo.com)
The worst pain, is the pain you don't see. Emotional pain. There is no pill or Band-Aid for the hurt a child feels inside.
Latest comment first
January 29 at 8:15AM
Name: J. Richard White
Comment: I was a bedwetter for part of my early life. I don't remember how often I wet the bed, but it was pretty often from the time I was 4 (my earliest memory) until I was 12. I wet the bed once when I was 14, but I had had heat stroke and had lost 32 pounds in less than a week and I attributed that bedwetting to my delirious state. My mother threatened to put me in diapers and rubber pants and I encouraged her to do so. I wanted her to save herself from washing sheets so much. I think my siblings and me had been traumatized by my father's death in a military plane crash. My sister and brother also had problems other than bedwetting. I also slept so deeply that I was hard to wake up. I think it does scar you for life, because I still remember my disappointment at bedwetting outside my home as I wet my girlfriends bed one weekend when I was only 8. She was so good that she came to wipe my tears and hold my head in her lap and tell me that it was an accident and that no one outside of our two families would ever know about it. Quite a noble thing for a girl of 8 to do with her little bedwetting baby. I was forever grateful but that was a traumatic memory for the rest of my life. I did not go to sleepovers any time in my younger days nor did I have any at my home. I still consider myself partly as a baby from my early years as a bedwetter. Go figure.
Comment: The intentional humiliation or shaming of a child through forced diapering when diapers are not physically required, or through unnecessary public exposure of an older child's diapers, is unnecessarily traumatic to a child, highly irresponsible on the part of a 'would be' care giver, and in some cases may lead to criminal prosecution for child abuse. (simplified.)
Comment: My sister used diaper discipline on her son and daughter. Now my niece treats jail like a motel with a revolving door. Nobody in the family has seen or heard from my nephew in over four years. Spudnuts if you see this Uncle Joe-key still loves you and I want to hear from you.
Comment: I am an adult baby. I was never in DD myself, but I believe that a DD parent and their DD son tried to get me put in DD. When I was about 12 (1961), I was playing with the boy next door. He said "lets try on diapers". He gave me a diaper and plastic pants. I put on the diaper he gave me while he put on his diaper. If he already had a diaper on, I would not have put the diaper on. I believe he was in DD and because I wasn't in diapers he was told to get me to put a diaper on and given permission to temporary remove his diaper. Our house was burglarized and my father told me this boy had been in trouble with the law and he believed that this boy did it and I was not to see him any more. I knew my father had no proof, but there was nothing I could do about it. My father never said anything about the diapers, but I sure he knew.
Comment: It blows my mind that this is a real thing. This is incredibly sick. How is doing this to their children not considered abuse? That site is still around. Where is Anonymous when you need them?
Recently parents have been getting arrested finally for using diaper dicipline on their children. You can read the news stories about those arrested for using diaper discipline on their children by clicking "HERE" Diaper Discipline (DD) IS against the law. Don't use it!